Building a Small Group Story Brand – Part 2

In part 1 of this series, I wrote about how I discovered that our Small Group system was trying to solve the wrong problem based on the Storybrand framework developed by Donald Miller. In this post I want to show you how we went about identifying our current problem (which we were not solving) and to identify the problem we needed to solve going forward.

The 2 Problems that Small Groups wrestle with

As I finished up chapter 5 of Building a Story Brand I immediately began wrestling with the material that was presented. In this chapter, Miller talked about the key to the entire Storybrand framework which was ‘the problem’. As I began to think about ‘a problem’ and ‘the solution’ that we were offering. it dawned on me that most Small Groups are trying to solve one of two problems. The first problem is community. We know that people feel isolated and alone in and off themselves and if they can join with others, it will unlock their desire to be known and loved. The second problem is discipleship. We are all broken and sinful people by nature. It is only when we accept Jesus Christ as our savior and begin to follow him as a disciple can we begin to take steps to work on the shortcoming of our life. If these problems sound familiar, it’s because they are the same problems that many people who lead Small Groups have wrestled with. This was not unique to our situation. What was unique was that the people who attend our church and live in our area did not identify with the problem we were trying to solve.

Houston, we have a problem

Our church is located in the suburbs of Houston, TX. Houston is the 4th largest city in the US and is ranked as the most diverse city in America. The communities surrounding our church are filled with what are known as ‘master-planned communities’. These are housing communities surrounded by parks, shopping, recreation, and schools so that you never have to leave your neighborhood to get what you need. As a result you get to know your neighbors and the people who live around you pretty well. Also as a result of the diversity of our city, many people of the same ethnic group and culture will seek out and build relationship with each other. Here in lies our problem. We had been presenting the problem to our community as they were lonely and needed to make friends with other people. Our community was telling us through their lack of response that they did not have a community problem. Our community had a discipleship problem.

Settling on the right problem

There is was! The problem that we needed to solve going forward. Once we were able to flesh this out, some pretty amazing things started happening. People were coming up to us and telling us about their desire to ‘grow deeper’. Leaders where catching us in the halls and tells us they were feeling the pull of God to lead a ‘deeper kind of Small Group’. Our leadership team was expressing their vision for our ministry to include ‘preparing and equipping people to be disciples’. It’s no coincidence that all this was taking place because we had correctly identified the right problem our groups needed to solve.

Where do we go from here?

Were far from done! In fact, we haven’t even started taking our first steps as a ministry yet. So you might be reading this and you are asking yourself “how can I learn from what you did’? Great question! Here are my list of recommendations:

  • Buy a copy of Building a Story Brand and read it with your Small Group team. If you are flying solo, buy the book and start taking notes.
  • Engage in conversations with the people at your church. Ask them ‘why’ they are in a small group? Or the inverse ask them why they are not in small group?
  • Take time to really process through the idea of your message and are the people at your church listening. Have you been offering groups for some time now, but you are not seeing any growth in engagement? This might be a sign that your message is not connecting.
  • Engage with me others about what you are processing. If you are going through this with a team, schedule time to talk and debrief together. If you are flying solo, feel free to email me and I will be glad to engage in dialogue with you.

I owe a huge debt of gratitude to Donald Miller for his book and for helping our church think through our message. My prayer is that it will also be a source of encouragement and clarity for you as you look to engage your church in being in a Small Group.

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Building a Small Group Story Brand – Part 1

A few weeks ago I purchased a copy of Donald Miller’s new book ‘Building a Story Brand‘ because I saw that others on social media where recommending it. Selfishly the reason for my purchase was to check off a goal for the year of reading a certain number of books, but once I got into it, I found it was so much more. I was recently asked to share what I discovered from reading this book and I will attempt to do so in this post. Stick with me because I will have to lay some ground work, but I hope to show you when I am finished that this book is a must read for Small Group pastor’s and point people.

Why aren’t people joining?

As I was looking through Amazon and social media to purchase a book that would get me to fulfilling my goal, I ran across this new book by Donald Miller. I had heard Donald speak at Catalyst Cincinnati in 2016 on this very subject and I was very interested in hearing more about it. The thing that sold me on the purchase and the thing that makes this book so important is the subtitle ‘Clarifying your message so Customers Will listen’. At the same time as I was preparing to purchase the book, our Small Groups team had been making plans for 2018. We also had been looking at numbers and outcomes from 2017 and began to ask the question ‘why aren’t more people joining a Small Group?’

I began looking at our message ‘Join a Small Group’ through the lens of Miller’s StoryBrand framework. In this framework (which he describes in the book) the goal is to take your company, organization, product, etc and look at it through the lens of a story. Every story, Miller writes, follows a predictable pattern and includes a hero and a guide. The hero (the customer) has a problem that they must solve and needs the assistance of a guide (that’s you!) to help them. I immediately resonated with the members of our church being the hero and our Small Groups being the guide in the story, but I became stuck on the problem. I was convinced that we were trying to solve the wrong problem.

Identifying the problem

In our marketing and the language that we had been using about Small Groups, we had gravitated to using phrases like ‘join a Small Group because it is the place that you are going to meet and make friends’ and this was falling on deaf ears. What I had identified through Miller’s Storyboard framework was that we had been trying to solve the wrong problem. Our ‘customers’ did not want to ‘buy’ the solution we were selling by joining a Small Group.

To often in our approach to encouraging people to join a Small Group we fail to answer the crucial question of ‘why’. Just like the consumer at the store choosing between buying product A & B, we need to give them a convincing reason to buy what we are selling. With so many forces and factors in play for the people in our churches time and attention, ‘we have to speak to the parts of their brain that make it easy for them to digest’.

Survive & Thrive

In pages 6-7 of Building a Story Brand, Miller relates a conversation that he had with Mike McHargue about how the human brain processes information. Reckoning back to our first class in Psychology 101, McHargue re-acquaints us with Abraham Maslow. If you need a refresher, Maslow said that there was a pyramid that built on each other and it all centered on fulfilling certain needs and our brains are ‘wired’ to do this without a second thought. The first of these needs being survival. Then it is safety. Then our brains turn to relationships and once our relationships are taken care of, then it turns it attention to ‘pursuing a greater sense of meaning’.

The problem we encounter is that our message to our customers does not meet the framework that our simple brains are trying to pursue–survive and thrive. As a result it is ignored. This was our reality. We had failed to understand what message need to be communicated to people so they would, at a subconscious level, want to buy our product.

So what did they want to buy? How could we reframe our message to better communicate the problem they need us to solve?

In part 2, I will diagram how we went about identifying our current problem (which we were not solving) to identifying the problem we needed to solve going forward.

An Essay on Community from a Chipotle Drink Cup

CultivatingThought2Cups_Kingsolver02I was eating lunch yesterday at Chipotle with my family and I happened to notice this short essay on my drink cup. It’s from an author named Barbara Kingsolver and it is apart of a series of writing called Cultivating Thought. Here is what she wrote,

TWO-MINUTE CHEER FOR THE HOME TEAM
by BARBARA KINGSOLVER

The ancient human social construct that once was common in this land was called community. We lived among our villagers, depending on them for what we needed. If we had a problem, we did not discuss it over the phone with someone in Mumbai. We went to a neighbor. We acquired food from farmers. We listened to music in groups, in churches or on front porches. We danced. We participated. Even when there was no money in it. Community is our native state. You play hardest for a hometown crowd. You become your best self. You know joy. This is not a guess, there is evidence. The scholars who study social well-being can put it on charts and graphs.

The happiest people are the ones with the most community.

In the last 30 years our material wealth has increased in this country, but our self-described happiness has steadily declined. Elsewhere, the people who consider themselves very happy are not in the very poorest nations, as you might guess, nor in the very richest. The winners are Mexico, Ireland, Puerto Rico, the kinds of places we identify with extended family, noisy villages, a lot of dancing. The happiest people are the ones with the most community.

Many people will read this essay and agree with the author’s general point. The world is not what it was. The simpler times that we once knew are no more and many of us long to return to them. While I agree that the picture that the author paints is of a time and place that I can remember in some aspects. What I take away from this essay is the last line.

“The happiest people are the ones with the most community.”

The people who I know who feel the most happiness in this life are the ones who choose to spend it with other people. To let other people into our lives and walk with us is one of
the smartest and at the same time one of the most humble things we can do. As a Small Group Pastor I have seen firsthand the power of this played out in the lives of the people who I pastor and also in my own life.

The world is desperately in need of community! Not the kind of fake, I know you online but have no clue what happens in your life from Monday-Friday kind of community! Invite others into your life. Make lunch and coffee appointments with someone and watch your level of happiness rise. We were never made to make this journey alone! Seek out the happiness you may be missing by connecting with other people around a table, sharing a meal, and enjoying the blessing of community.

On a scale of…

Brass_scales_with_cupped_traysMy five-year old daughter has a new habit of putting simple things on a scale. Recently she said to me “Daddy I am hungry! It’s like a 100 out of 100.” We laugh at how she is putting her hunger on a scale, but we often do this exact thing but with things like our goodness, generosity, or maybe our financial status. We get into the “compare game” and say to ourselves “well I am not as bad as (fill in the blank)”.  This attitude is so subtle but it is incredibly dangerous! It is dangerous because it lulls us into believing that the flaws in our character are not something we should be working on because there is no motivation to change them. More importantly it causes us to withdraw from an attitude of dependence on God. A God who accepts us for who we really are despite our flaws. We in essence become a “pharisee” who looks down on the shortcoming of others while “white-washing” our own faults. Jesus in Gospels saved his sternest rebukes for people in this camp!

The challenge for all of us is to not compare! When we are tempted to go down that road we need to stop ourselves and realize that all of us fall short in some area of our lives. And we serve a God who has made up for all of our short-comings in the person of Jesus Christ who died on the cross. So let me ask you:

What area(s) of your life are you apt to compare yourself to others? How can you focus on helping others overcome their shortcoming instead of comparing yourself to them?

Getting into the Mess of People’s Lives

I don’t like messes! It is somewhat therapeutic for me to say that but on the other hand I am aware that trying to avoid messes can be a very difficult and sometimes tall order. I am a father of two girls who both like to make a mess on a daily basis. I am also a Pastor and in my job I am required to deal with people who are not always at their best. I am asked to insert myself into their mess! For me that is not always a pleasant experience but one that we need to be comfortable embracing. I have been very challenged by this idea recently as I see in the life and ministry of Jesus no hesitation to insert and in fact place himself directly into people’s messes.

In the gospel of John chapter 9 we see Jesus directly get involved in the life of a man who had simply been born blind. His disciples were simply passing by and took the occasion to ponder the ramifications of our sin upon our bodies. Jesus turns the focus of the discussion off the circumstances that resulted in this man being blind into healing him and the act of the healing being a catalyst for further dialogue between Jesus and the Jewish leaders who were seeking a way to get rid of him. Notice how Jesus inserts himself into this man’s life.

Having said these things, he spit on the ground and made mud with the saliva. Then he anointed the man’s eyes with the mud and said to him, “Go, wash in the pool of Siloam” (which means Sent). So he went and washed and came back seeing” John 9:6-7 (ESV)

 And after literally getting himself dirty by ‘spitting on the ground and making mud with his saliva’ Jesus continued to be involved in this man’s life because his healing created another set of circumstances that saw this man standing before the Pharisees and answering questions.

Sometimes getting involved in someone’s life does not end with one-act, but may require a longer commitment. This is the part that is troubling for many of us. We like the kettle outside of the retail stores at Christmas because we simply throw some money into it and go on our way. Volunteering to go down to the Salvation Army and actually having to spend time with people and getting to hear their story. Too messy! The reality is that a majority of the people who walk into our churches each Sunday have one mess or another going on in their life. Some people have done a really good job of hiding their mess so that it’s hidden from plain sight, but it’s still there! We need to be comfortable with messy people and be willing to insert ourselves into their lives because the end result is life change. The man born blind saw his life changed because Jesus was willing to get messy are you?

A response to ‘2 unintended consequences of the idea that “anyone can lead a group”

Last week Eric Geiger wrote a post on his blog in which he talked about two of the ‘unintended consequences’ that have come out of the method that some churches use like Saddleback of recruiting people to be hosts for their small groups. There are many churches, because of their size, that need to recruit a lot of leaders and they have adopted a pragmatic philosophy that in order to lead a small group you do not have to be super spiritual, or posses a Bible College degree. You simply have to be open to leading and have a growing relationship with God. Geiger says that this creates an identity crisis because you are asking them to fill a role of leadership when they are not fit or ready to lead because you have not asked them to be a leader but a host. I would disagree with Geiger that ‘not just “anyone” can lead them. If “anyone” can lead them, then the groups cannot possibly be expected to provide nurture and community that is rooted in the Word’. Have we not moved beyond the battles of clergy and laity? Must these people be in full-time ministry to lead a small group? or pray? Or provide accountability? I think we would all agree that anyone can do these things and can be trained to do them. Maybe it is merrily and argument of semantics but in my view a leader and a host are not that much different but it ultimately comes down to what is the church asking these people to do in the role they are recruiting them to? If we are asking them to just host some people and not provide any leadership then it incorrect to call them leaders. But say we call them ‘hosts’ and we train them to do all the things a leader does, should it matter that they are called a ‘host’? I think the bottom line is we have to be clear in explaining the role we are recruiting people to volunteer for and if it is a leadership role then we need to have a process of leadership development in place to train people to lead others. Geiger’s second point is in my opinion akin to stereotyping and name calling. If the goal is that people are getting into community (which he admits is good) is it fair to criticize their method for doing so? While I agree with his premise that just because you can place play on DVD player does not mean you are disciplining people. I would not label any church that is using this method as “consumerist’.  This sort of pontificating and broad-stroke stereotyping is exactly what we are not called to do as believers. I would suggest that instead of criticizing their method that we challenge them to consider how they will use their method to ‘make disciples’ and if they cannot give a good answer to sit down with them and help create a plan for making it happen. FInally, blogs of this kind make for good copy but in the end all they end of doing is create more disunity. This post contains no suggestions or action items for church who are using this system to be challenged to examine whether they are being effective. Is it just one person taking a shot at an entire system and that to me is sad. My prayer is that we can just agree that people need community! People need to be discipled and we rally around how to see that happen and not criticize the methods that we employ to do it.

Must you be organized to lead?

LeadershipI have been thinking a lot about leadership and specifically the organizational ability of the leader. There are two ways of looking at this issue. The first is that a leader is anyone who can influence others and that organizational ability is something that can be delegated to someone else. The way of looking at this is that while you may be able to lead through your influence, you will be less than effective because the inability to organize, plan, create systems will hold you back.

If history is any indicator then it has shown us that a lack of organizational ability has not limited some of the great leaders throughout the ages. Part of that many be due in large part to their ‘personality’ as people often are attracted to larger than life figures who capture our attention. There are countless examples of these kind of leaders and when we look back on them we often think of them as a ‘leader’ but not necessary dwell on how organized they were or were not.

Question: Is being organized an integral part of being a leader?